[ Stan's quiet at that question, he starts to pace because well... that's what he does at times when he gets anxious, when the sadness seems to crowd in in a way he doesn't know how to deal with. ]

I think so.

[ Stan's brow furrows. ]

When we went to go fight It... when I made the choice to go into Neibolt's house I knew that the choice was going to kill me. Even if It didn't kill me ... I just... knew somehow It would.

[ Maybe that doesn't make sense. It's hard to explain. ]

But if It came back...and I couldn't go back but I was alive there would be no way that the others would be able to beat It. We had to be together. The only option would be if I wasn't alive. So I think I killed myself because they needed to be able to beat It and that was the only way I could help them.

[ He's adds after a second. ]

Apparently I have a wife...[ He furrows his brow because he's still bothered by the questions he doesn't have answers to. Does he have kids? Did he do what Bev's mom did to her to them? He doesn't think he has kids but... the thought is heavy all the same because he can't be sure. ]